good timing.

i didn't get it.

i made sure to collect all my eggs before creating the basket.
i hoped. i wished. i wanted it so bad.

i didn't get it.

sufjan knows where to take me.

i am sad, not because a great opportunity has opened other doors, i am sad because i remain positive that my future endeavors will rock the house.

i regret to inform you you'll be seeing more of me.

what happened tonight.

sometimes, i make my life play out like a movie.
i create the drama because i love the attention it may attract.
entertainment--
it only helps me understand life.

here's a scene from tonight:

(backstory: i dated this 'artist' for a few weeks, back in january of this year. we really hit it off, but things dwindled quickly as timing remained an issue. he brushed me off in an unfriendly, rude way and i disrespect him for rejecting a possible friendship.)

i'm biking home, on the well-lit streets, from PROJECTproject. i decide to turn up bathurst from queen, hand signals and all. (he lives north of this corner)

i always think i'll run into him, every time i take this route, and i wonder what i'd tell him if we were face-to-face again. well low and behold, there he was. the car in front of me had slowed down, and almost exactly when i was parallel to the vehicle, he exited.

things to say quickly ran through my mind and i started to accelerate my pedaling. i knew this was my moment. i could yell out exactly what i've wanted to say for a long time...

in my most character-accentuated, swamp-like voice, i yelled "ASSHOLE!" and never looked back.

i felt great, for about 20 seconds until the car he was dropped from, caught up with me with the windows down. three other, intimidating and mildly attractive men were looking down upon me, with a grin. "WHO YOU CALLING ASSHOLE?" was rebutted from their car.

at that moment in time, i had to remain crazy.
i couldn't belt out that the buddy they had just dropped off was a coward slash jerk.
they had won.
the tables turned.
them and their all-terrain vehicle.

at least i can write about it.

almost swoon.

you,
and your accident-prone eyelashes,

me,
and my rashy chest.


we look good together.

rockin' hard.

everything is solid.

rocket plane dream.

i lie in bed at 4:26am, startled.

i had a really weird dream....

i was watching an over animated man help a couple in a stranded car on the highway. he was removing snow from their vehicle with a weird smile on his face. he was 'too helpful'... it annoyed the couple inside.

some other spectators pulled up and asked me what all the commotion was about...

i shrugged my shoulders.

then my attention was caught by a jet-like plane that was about to land.

i pointed towards the clouds and yelled "LOOK!"

everyone was amazed since it was literally 50 feet away from us.

all of a sudden, it started to head for a forest, spinning out of control.
by this time, it was summer, for some reason.

it disappeared into the forest and then sprung upwards again into the sky, for an emergency landing.

then, heading nose first in a field, it sprung up again, and again. with a blasting noise every time.

the crowd cringed continuously as it was really painful to watch.

immediately after, it plummeted to the ground and i could see the pilot struggling inside. it had crashed.

the windshield opened and he ejected himself from the rocket-plane.

he came up to the crowd for high fives and i went up to him and said "you're my hero". but at the exact same time, another girl had said that too.

i woke up, feeling angry and unoriginal.

spring fever.

can you feel it?

there's nothing but good all around.

survey says:

i recently had a roast in honour of my twenty-fifth birthday. let's just say, a little survey my sister created, caught me by surprise.

being friends with comedians/performers/weird people, i thought i'd share, with you, the best of the q + a.

let's have a laugh:

1- WHAT WORD REMINDS YOU OF RENEE?

Scrumtrelescent x2
Vibrant
Fresh
Exberant
Love
Awesome-pants
Mysterious
The
Stinky
Deductable
Carrot Cake
Effervescent
Soul
Marshmallows
Purrrrfect
Delectible
Jelling
Skank

2- WHAT DISEASE/VIRUS WOULD BEST DESCRIBE RENEE'S PERSONALITY?

Terrets x2
Birdflu x2 (because birds are endearing)
HIV x2 (because she gives great high fives)
Aids x2 (because once infected, there is no cure)
Ebola virus x2 (because she's highly contagious)
Lukemia (because she gets in your blood)
Sinus infection (because she's always in your head)
Fever of Love
Anthrax
Melonoma
E Coli
Heart murmur
The clap
The flu

3- IF RENEE GOT ARRESTED, WHAT WOULD IT BE FOR?

Sex in a public x3
Public Affection
Public nuissance
Disturbing the peace
Money laundering
Lewd conduct
Assault & Battery
Eating homeless people
Stealing a board game
Saying something to a police officer that he wouldn't want to hear
Being stupid
Holding a corn fighting tournament
Bullying
Jay walking

4- WHAT SONG REMINDS YOU OF RENEE?

Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band x2
Chantilly Lace
Livin La Vida Loca
Smells Like Teen Spirit
Chicago
Theme from Karate Kid 2
Jungle Boogy
Let's Go Fly a Kite- Marry Poppins
Magic Man- Heart
Dreamer- Supertramp
Anything by Jamiroquai
Happy Happy Joy Joy
99 Red Balloons
Sexy Back
Total Eclipse of the Heart

5- WHAT FOOD DISH REMINDS YOU OF RENEE?

Sushi x2
Peanut butter and jelly sandwhich
Hot chocolate with whipped cream
Bangers N' Mash
A Wok
Cheese cake
Ravioli (because she's filled with interesting ingredients)
Cheese and crackers
Cinnamon buns
Poutine
Warm apple pie
Candy
Gyoza
Sheppard's pie
Soup
Jelly beans
Chicken souvlaki
Fun dip
Deviled eggs

oh, what a night it was!
awww, shucks.

ladders

sometimes i don't understand
why you drag words on
like a protection shield.
why that tone is becoming familiar.
you shouldn't have to prove yourself to me.

climbing the ladder, eh?
i see.

what i can't see
is myself
i'm there.
but not ahead, nor behind-
content.

almost the same,
but different
my ladder.

don't get so high,
too high,
where it's hard for people to aim.

the story of 'ter'

so this girl walks in, right?
& she's got this wicked ass hat-
& an allure about her that's rare.

sharp,
witty,

this counter-boy,
mr. red shirt,
sports a mustached horse
and likes to banter quite the same.

late charges?
there was a game
they liked to play.
when that tea pot walked out
a fantasy was created.